I have started, stopped, stalled, and scrapped this post more times than I care to count. As hard as I try, I can’t seem to make the words find their ways from my heart onto the keyboard and onto the blog.
I keep telling myself, “This is so self-absorbed. People have bigger things to worry about. It’s not the time to talk about gratitude while it feels like the world is melting around us.”
But in the spirit of running for flights or making last-minute deadlines, I am writing this tribute in the last hours of my 49th year. I hope to finish it, give it a quick edit, and post it before midnight. Yes, March 2 is “that” birthday for me.
My hope is that this tribute is not about me or “my” things, but about you. My friends and loved ones. The people in this house and in my community – those who share the pews, parking lots, piazzas, planes and pancake houses of my life. I wanted to find a way to thank people I love by crafting a grand gesture of some kind as a way to say, “Thank You.”
Why the grand gesture? Well, why not? I never met a grand gesture I didn’t love. They are some of my favorite things. The big reveal. The surprise visit. The rare find. The big boom or balloon drop. Something about these moments speak to my soul.
But a pandemic and the reality of 2022 make the grand gestures harder to construct. How do I create a grand gesture of some kind that captures what I am feeling around “that birthday?”
This has taken me by surprise. Spiraling around this idea, a dear friend counseled me to “Just share your love with people you love. That’s the grand gesture. It’s not a compromise, it is the gift.” And so, here goes. 50 grand gestures that mean something to me and make me grateful to be alive. To be clear, some are small things. Some are colossal creations. Some are replicable, some have seen their moment. Either way, they are my gift to you. In the most self-absorbed spirit of gratitude I can muster on the last day of 49. These are the gestures that make life grand. And each of them have been shared with so many of you.
50 Grand Gestures – Things in Life I Love
(In no particular order. The one that you needed to read is the one I wanted you to read first.)
That moment when the afternoon sunlight feels like it is gold.
The smell of bread coming out of a bakery in the morning.
Someone holding a book that is sacred to them.
California in the Autumn.
The velvet texture of real balsamic vinegar on your tongue.
Hand-written notes.
The feeling when you know God answered a prayer.
Piazza Pantheon in Rome in summer.
The smell of a garden tomato, right where the stem meets the fruit.
Finding a coin.
Ice cubes in the right drinks.
A team that cares about the people as much as the project.
Someone who bails out a friend without expectation of repayment.
Perfectly crafted and polished wood.
When a singer completely conquers a note or a song and you can see it in their expression.
Young couples on their first plane/train to Paris.
When young children pray.
Homecomings at airports or train stations.
When Brazilian people dance. To almost anything.
Quilts that have a mistake purposely pieced into the pattern.
Someone in the process of healing.
That moment right before a movie starts at the cinema.
Women leaders who break boundaries.
People who know how to pull off a hat.
Rugs with little bits of history woven into the design.
Sidewalks in Rio.
Tables set for an important visitor.
When someone whispers in your ear and it makes your neck tingle.
Running into a friend in an airport.
Real pasta.
Men who aren’t afraid to tell other men they love them.
Stained glass that tells the story of something inspirational.
How Armenians offer toasts at the dinner table.
White twinkle lights wrapped around palm trees.
Christmas.
When young people sing at concerts.
Grandparents when they see their grandkids after a long time.
Dancing and laughing at the same time.
When someone shares in friendship about their faith.
The smell of butter when it starts to smell almost “nutty.”
A kiss that leaves you wanting more.
A cookie so good that it makes you want to kiss someone.
The Huntington Library.
Frosty(ies). Peanut Buster Parfaits. And FroYo.
People who stop-by at just the right moment.
How two sisters can communicate by just looking at each other.
When you find a ribbon from a gift that meant a lot.
A stirring speech from a leader of courage.
Someone who knows how to help others mourn.
Bridges so beautiful they inspire awe.
Lovers who intertwine pinky fingers when they think nobody can see.
Salt and bread ceremonies to welcome guests or visitors.
People who apologize, and mean it, and move on.
An honest, simple and delicious meal.
That feeling when a workout leaves you feeling strong, not exhausted.
The crunchy shard of chocolate hiding in a straciatella gelato.
People who write, and recite, poems.
A really good (welcome, consensual) hug.
Fonts. The good ones.
People who are great at what they do.
When the spring bulbs start peeking out of the soil.
The National Gallery.
When a teenager realizes it doesn’t matter what other people think about them.
Cinnamon rolls at the perfect temperature.
Laughing with a friend so hard that you cry.
Crying so hard with a friend that you laugh.
Highways in the desert.
Humanitarians – who truly earn and live the title.
That comfy sweater that knows your torso better than you do.
Watching people kiss at the Eiffel Tower.
When you catch someone looking at themselves in the mirror and they feel beautiful.
A truly fine hotel.
The look in someone’s eyes after they’ve made it through something tough.
Strong grandmas.
Old family photos.
Olive oil so good it transports you.
The staircase in the San Pancreas in London.
Sand in your toes.
When kids get the education their grandparents dreamed of.
Pot-luck dinners.
That baby that latches gazes with you in the market and smiles.
That feeling right after the dentist cleans your teeth.
A really satisfying conversation. The unexpected kind.
Clean laundry.
Simple, unexpected solutions to persistent problems.
A book that makes you wish it kept on going forever.
Cufflinks with a story.
Stories with a surprise.
When someone is playing the cello in the subway.
The news that a friend’s test says they are “cancer free.”
The friends who help bury loved ones who are now free from cancer.
The way that Indians embrace fabric and color as a language.
Flowers from someone’s garden.
Being able to forgive and re-connect.
When someone reminds you that you are a Child of God.
Cheese so good it feels like love.
Moments of peace. In life. In society.
Anything with Emily. Even the difficult stuff. And especially the awesome stuff.
I have been blessed beyond what I can believe that I have been part of, or party to, some of the above. And I am grateful for those who have shared these with me and made them part of my proxy experiences.
May your life include these grand gestures. May the world have access to the basics, and may the basics remind us of the greatness around us. You and your friendship are the grandest of gestures any man could have.
With love,
Aaron
P.S. Of course there are more than 50. I hope you will add some of yours. And delight in the grand gestures that have been given each of us as part of life.
1 comment
What a beautiful list! Thank you for sharing so many things that bring you joy!