Tough Headlines, Tough Questions, Holy Places

I’ve learned as a father that there are times when you simply don’t have all the answers.  These past few weeks I have found myself talking with my 9-year-old son about some of the tragic headlines that have regrettably been part of our news.  Whether it be the deaths in a movie theater or a shooting in a Sikh temple, my son has been prompted to ask me powerful questions about why people turn to violence.

It wasn’t until the other day that I realized what was prompting his most recent question about the shootings in Wisconsin.  And it was coming from this blog.

A few months ago I posted about a chance meeting I had in a train with a kind man named Harinder.  On that post, I featured a picture I took with some new acquaintances who gave me a special tour of their Sikh temple in New Delhi.  We talked a lot about family, our faiths, the different ways that temples (in their religion and in my case in the Mormon faith) played important roles in our lives.  It was a wonderful afternoon that I will never forget.  It reminded me of the understanding that is built when people talk and share.

My son had clearly remembered this picture…because he asked me about it months later.  Clearly the recent headlines had been circulating in his head even more than I had realized.  We had talked about the shooting, but I had watched him revel in so many of the wonderful moments from the Olympics, I thought these were the international stories he was most focused on these past few weeks.

He took me aside the other day and asked me if the Sikh temple I visited in New Delhi and where I took the picture was the same kind of Sikh temple where violence had struck earlier this month.  I explained to him that there were probably some differences but that my understanding was that they were mostly the same (with the obvious difference of geography).  His follow-on question taught me a powerful lesson.  He asked me, “If it was a holy place, why would anyone ever want to destroy it – or stop someone else from feeling close to God?”

I had been focusing on so many of the other questions posed by the recent shooting in Wisconsin that I had perhaps overlooked this fundamental one.  In a world that could use more faith, more peace, and more understanding, my son was struggling to understand why violence would enter a holy place.

These are the tough questions.  They aren’t simple.  I am grateful for them as they help me explore my own faith and talk about it and help my children build their own.  But they remind me that one of the most precious places in our world are those spots where people can go to find solace and build their faith.  As I tucked my boy into bed tonight, we prayed tonight for the families in Wisonsin and for the holy places around the world.  He prayed so that they might all, regardless of their denomination or affiliation or geographical location, be protected.

And, yet again, I realized that I am the one doing all the learning in this whole parent-kid situation.

How have you discussed these recent headlines with your children?  I’d love your ideas and am grateful for any wisdom from the phenomenal parents in my life.